Thursday, September 21, 2017

Marriage 101: When Art Becomes Life

It's been a long time since I updated this series.

Recent happenings in my local town have prompted me to write this post.  A few weeks ago, I was considering auditioning for the latest play.  As I read through the script at home, I mentioned to Duncan that the two female parts to which I would be suited both involved romantic overtures, including stroking the face of a much older man, or wearing 'suggestive' outfits.  Duncan immediately told me he would feel very uncomfortable if I were to play one of those roles, even if it is 'only acting'.  I respected his wishes and did not audition.

Now I have found out that the two people who played the leading roles in last year's pantomime went on to have an affair!  The twist is that although he is single, she is a married mother, who I'm guessing is probably about fifteen years older than him.  The result is the ending of a marriage, children in a broken home, a devastated husband, a school community in conflict.  Both parties have left town....and aren't even together.  So, was it worth it?

This was a huge wake-up call for me.  Duncan was right to have reservations, even before we heard this scandal.  I might think it's 'only acting', but I have to be careful.  After all, how many Hollywood couples got together after playing on-screen lovers?  A lot!

This isn't just about acting.  I'm guessing most people reading this aren't involved in amateur theatre, but a heck of a lot are married or in relationships.  We need to be careful about how we spend our time with people of the opposite sex who are not our spouse.  I'm not saying don't have friends of the opposite sex, but be wise.  If you're single, respect these boundaries.

It's not worth throwing away your marriage for.

Related posts:
Lesson 9 from Sarah's School of Dating
From Head to Hand: Being a Christian Writer (just as relevant to being a Christian actor)

Friday, September 15, 2017

Gossip or Fair Warning

I like to take people at face value.  One of the negative things about living in a small town is that you inevitably hear ABOUT some people before you hear FROM them.  It's hard to give some people a fair go when your ears are ringing from warnings by the town gossips.  But, nevertheless, I do try.  I would hate it some people had made their mind up about me because of something (potentially) untrue that someone else had told them. That has happened because we are Christians and some locals don't like the church, so they therefore decide not to like us.  It's also happened because of where Duncan works.  He works for a corporate farm and some locals don't like the fact that farms were bought by a big businessman in Perth (never mind that he has brought heaps of young families to the town, but....I digress).  Duncan has had to put up with a few rude comments from some old codgers.

I remember receiving a warning from two (rather gossipy) people about another woman I had got to know.  As I got to know this woman, I found out that the gossip was untrue.  But, after a while, when the only interaction I had with her was via Facebook, I saw a different side to her.  She was quite rude to me online and I ended up unfriending her on Facebook.  I realised that what the gossips were saying had some merit.

That's the hard thing about friendships.  Sometimes people are nasty and start rumours that aren't true.  But sometimes they are just wanting to warn people not to become friends with a toxic person.  To be honest, I've wanted to warn others NOT to be friends with some people because of a negative interaction I've had.  At the same time, we're all different and attracted to different qualities in our friends.  A person I think is rude, you might think is lovely and vice versa.

It's a tough one.

Friday, September 08, 2017

The Pendulum: No-one is an Island

One of the key arguments for the 'Yes' side of the same-sex marriage debate in Australia is that gay people getting married doesn't hurt anyone else.  If it doesn't affect us, we just need to mind our own business.  (This article begs to differ)

That's the argument for many decisions people make every day....it's none of your business, it's not hurting you.  In a way, I agree.  Some of my decisions are mine (or mine and Duncan's) to make.  Why does it bother people if my child still has a dummy, or isn't toilet-trained by the time they think they should be?  Why does it bother someone else if we're against using the 'cry it out' method for sleep training?  Their sleep isn't being affected.

But that's not the case with all decisions.  No person is an island.  Some of our decisions DO affect others.  For example, I might decide that disciplining my children is wrong and they should be 'free spirited'.  It's all well and good to say that this parenting philosophy doesn't affect anyone....until my children go to school and their teachers have to deal with them, shoppers and diners have to deal with their unruly behaviour in public, other parents have to put up with trashed houses and disrespect during play dates.

Some of my decisions are mine to make.  God has given me freedom and, although others may have a different opinion, I will have to wear the consequences of my decision.

Other decisions have severe ramifications.

Think through your decision-making carefully.

Thursday, August 31, 2017

Dwell by Garage Hymnal

I'm thankful for my loving, gracious and merciful God who doesn't treat me as my sins deserve.

I spent time away from you,
Turned my back away from you,
But you drew me near to you, you drew me near.

I hold you at a distance, but you wait so patiently,
Gently whisper, gently tell me what I need to hear,
You tell me what I need to hear.

You say my soul dwells in the hope of tomorrow,
I will trust you, and I will sing only,
Because my soul dwells in the hope of tomorrow,
I will trust you, and I will sing to you.

You spent time pursuing me,
You sent your Son to die for me,
You sang songs of life to me,
You sang songs.

You say my soul dwells in the hope of tomorrow,
I will trust you, and I will sing only,
Because my soul dwells in the hope of tomorrow,
I will trust you, and I will sing,
Yes, I will sing,
Lord, I will sing only to you.

Lord, you hear my selfish cries,
Lord, you read my darkest thoughts,
Lord, you see my foolish ways,
Lord, you sense my deepest fears,
Lord, you know my doubting heart,
And still you long, you long for me.
I hold you at a distance,
But you wait so patiently.

Because my soul dwells in the hope of tomorrow,
I will trust you, and I will sing.


Lyrics from here

Thursday, August 24, 2017

Books and Chooks

Rory's school celebrated Book Week this week, and on Monday, all of the children (plus teachers) dressed up as a character from a book.

Of course Rory wanted to go as Thomas.



Since I knew I wouldn't be able to drive for a fair while after surgery, I needed to get a head start on it.  I told Rory, "No changing your mind."

He didn't win a prize, but had a fantastic day.  Thomas is looking a bit worse for wear though.

Later that afternoon, I made a sad discovery.  Marilyn, my White Leghorn hen, was dead behind the perch.  It seems that she must have died during the previous night and fallen off her perch.



Of course, Rory had to get on the bus the next morning and announce loudly, "Marilyn fell off her perch and broke her neck."

I'm not sure what the bus driver thought....

Monday, August 21, 2017

Quote of the Day

When you say, "There's too much evil in this world," you assume there's 'good'.  When you assume there's good, you assume there's such a thing as a 'moral law' on the basis of which to differentiate between good and evil. But if you assume a moral law, you must posit a 'Moral Law-Giver', but that's who you're trying to disprove and not prove. Because if there's no Moral Law-Giver, there's no moral law. If there's no moral law, there's no good. If there's no good, there's no evil.
What is your question?
- Ravi Zacharias

Friday, August 18, 2017

Friday Funny

WHY TEACHERS DRINK