The Sedshed Annual Christian Book Giveaway

It's time to do a giveaway on this blog.  I've been planning this for a while.

Below I've listed all of the Christian books I've reviewed since February last year when I last gave away a book.  I'm going to give one lucky reader a book of their choice.

Why?  Perhaps it's to celebrate this blog having over 2000 published comments.  Or perhaps it's because of my upcoming 30th birthday (although technically I should be the one getting a present haha).  Perhaps I'm just feeling nice. :)

Yes, there is a catch.  To enter I need you leave a comment telling me about your reading habits.  The comments will not be published.  Instead I will compile an anonymous list of what everyone said once the winner has been announced next Friday 24th May.  It will be very interesting to see what kind of readers you all are.  (If you aren't a reader, you can still enter by stating that you don't read much).

I need you to please answer the following questions:

1.  How often do you pick up a book? (daily, nightly, fortnightly, randomly, hardly ever, when I get a chance etc)
2.  What sort of books do you read the most? (fiction, Christian books, self help, biographies etc)
3.  Where/when do you usually read? (in bed before going to sleep, during breakfast, on the train on the way to work, sitting in the car waiting to pick up the kids, in the hammock etc)
4.  What is one Christian book (other than the Bible) that you recommend all Christians should read?

The winner will be drawn randomly.  There is no right or wrong answers.  Even if you hardly ever read, you are very welcome to enter.  Maybe none of the books appeal to you, but you might consider entering to win one for a friend.

Here are the books on offer (with links to my reviews):

The Trellis and the Vine

Don't Waste Your Life

Operation World

Leading Better Bible Studies

One To One Bible Reading

Why We're Not Emergent (By Two Guys Who Should Be)

Unpacking Forgiveness

Forgiving Hitler

The True and Living God

Suffering Well

The Best Kept Secret of Christian Mission

Making the Most of the Cross

Now That You Are Back

The Envy of Eve

You have until 4pm (West Australian time) next Friday 24th May.

ENTER, ENTER, ENTER :)

Rianna's 30th

I've been to my fair share of 30th birthday parties in years gone by, but this year is definitely the year of 30ths.

My good friend Rianna turned 30 in late March.  Hers was the third 30th I'd been invited to this year so far (I couldn't attend my friend Rhianon's in January because it was the day after I had Rory).  Duncan was relieved that Rianna's party didn't involve costumes. ;)

We took Rory with us so some other friends could meet him for the first time.  I'm not sure if I would take him again.  He was quite unsettled and it's hard to concentrate on conversations when you're wondering if your baby is crying and you can't hear him over the noise.  Still, it was a good night and a great celebration.

Countdown: two weeks to go until I turn the big 3-0.

Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus by Helen H Lemmel

This song has brought me great comfort this year.  I often found myself humming the tune while I was in hospital:

O soul are you weary and troubled?
No light in the darkness you see?
There's a light for a look at the Saviour,
And life more abundant and free.

Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim,
In the light of His glory and grace.

Through death into life everlasting,
He passed and we follow him there;
Over us no more sin hath dominion -
For more than conquerors are we.

His Word shall not fail you - He promised;
Believe Him, and all will go well:
Then go to a world that is dying,
His perfect salvation to tell.

Lyrics sourced from here.

In Memory of My Auntie

Mother's Day was a sad day for two of my cousins this year.

On the 15th April, my Auntie Alison, who I visited in Adelaide nearly four years ago, lost her battle with lung cancer.  I was in hospital when I got the news.  I wanted to go to Adelaide for the funeral, but my mum advised me it wouldn't be a good idea when I was already so fragile.

I only met her a couple of times in my life, but she never failed to send me a card for my birthday.

She was my Nan's daughter-in-law and they were so much alike in personality, despite them not being blood relatives.  Even when my uncle passed away, they always kept in touch every fortnight by phone.

I will miss her.

Auntie Al and her dog, Max

With my mum and I

Reflections of a Mother

I read this years ago and thought it was appropriate seeing as I've just celebrated my first Mother's Day as a mum.  It's a great reminder of what I can control and what I must leave in God's hands.  This is for my son:

I gave you life,
But I cannot live it for you.

I can give you directions,
But I cannot be there to lead you.

I can take you to church,
But I cannot make you believe.

I can teach you right from wrong,
But I cannot always decide for you.

I can buy you beautiful clothes,
But I cannot make you beautiful inside.

I can offer you advice,
But I cannot accept it for you.

I can give you love,
But I cannot force it upon you.

I can teach you to share,
But I cannot make you unselfish.

I can teach you respect,
But I cannot force you to show honour.

I can advise you about friends,
But I cannot choose them for you.

I can advise you about sex,
But I cannot keep you pure.

I can tell you about alcohol and drugs,
But I cannot say "No" for you.

I can tell you about lofty goals,
But I cannot achieve them for you.

I can teach you about kindness,
But I cannot force you to be gracious.

I can pray for you,
But I cannot make you walk with God.

I can love you with unconditional love all of my life,
AND I WILL.

Prompted to Write: Rules To Live By

I've decided to take up Meredith's writing challenge with the topic Rules to live by.  Follow the link if you'd like to join in.

My recent stay in hospital revealed to me that I am much more of a rules person than I thought I was.  Rules are ok; they have their place.  But rules and small babies don't mix.

I've decided to ignore the baby books.  I partly blame those so-called 'baby whisperers' for the mess I've ended up in.  The nonsense they peddle to nervous first-time parents is criminal.  Have a strict schedule and your baby will sleep through the night at six weeks.  Let your child sleep in your bed and they will still be sleeping in your bed when they're in high school.  Don't let them suck their thumb or they'll still be sucking their thumb when they're 18.  Let them cry otherwise they'll manipulate you and will turn out to be a wuss.  You get the drift...  Of course I wanted to do things 'right'.  I'm a first-time mum.  I didn't have a clue.  Friends recommended these books.  Some were a bit more full-on by telling me I HAD to have a schedule otherwise I'd have a child hanging off my boob all day. Yep, those books combined with my ordered, structured personality were a ticking timebomb just waiting to explode.

What I learnt in the MBU is that when it comes to babies the only rules are good old-fashioned common sense, flexibility and love.  I drove myself mad trying to find the 'secret ingredient' to get Rory to sleep longer.  The only thing to do is resettle, resettle, resettle, and cuddle without the fear that I'm still going to have to cuddle him to sleep when he's a grown man!  I'm going to treasure these cuddles right now because they'll be over before I know it.

Many of those baby books treat all babies the same.  That the same routine etc will work for ALL babies!  What rubbish!  Babies are different just as all children and adults are different.  Before I had Rory I needed a good eight hours sleep a night to function, but I have friends who get by just fine with five.  I allowed myself to be convinced that there was something wrong with my beautiful son.  That just because he wasn't a good sleeper during the day that it erased all of the lovely things about him.  So he doesn't sleep for very long, so what?  He's got the best smile and laugh.  He loves people.  He's very handsome.  He loves to kick his little fat legs, especially in the bath.  I get annoyed when people ask me if he's a 'good baby'.  What's a 'good baby'?  One that sleeps all the time?  If that's the yardstick, then he'd be a 'bad baby'.  I was guilty of seeing him like that.  I wanted a robot instead of a son.  One that followed the rules perfectly.  I couldn't see what a gift I'd been given.

I came to hospital desperate that they 'fix' Rory's sleeping for me.  They gently showed me that I was the one who needed to be 'fixed'.  With a more settled mum, came a more settled bubba.  I needed to be freed from 'following the rules'.  When it comes to babies, the rule to live by is learning to be that patient, wiser, kinder person who helps them grow up in this world.

This was taken a few weeks back on the 12th April -
mine and Duncan's 5th wedding anniversary.

Home, Sweet Home

Rory and I are finally home!

I could never have imagined that when Duncan, Rory and I left on Good Friday for a long weekend in Dunsborough that I would also journey to Bunbury and Perth and wouldn't be home for over a month.  Yet, God in His loving wisdom knew that was what I needed.

I have mixed feelings about being home.  It is a place associated with unhappy memories over the past few months.  I just remember days of being unable to calm an unsettled baby, feeling like I just wanted to lie down and never wake up, that I was trapped in a nightmare.  Then there was the anxiety.  I felt like I was tiptoeing around, jumping at small noises and shaking randomly.  I just wanted to shut myself away from the world where nobody would be looking at me and Rory with curious smiles on their faces, wondering if I was going to sink or swim as a parent.

Things have changed for the better since I've been away.  I have to keep reminding myself that I'm not the same person I was before.  I'm armed with medication, new skills and confidence to fight my depression.  Home seems eerily quiet after the hustle and bustle of the MBU.  Whereas before the noise, people and crying babies would have elevated my stress levels, I miss the staff, patients and babies, the full days and the parks, shops and activity of Subiaco.  I asked Duncan if we could move to Subi and he just laughed and asked me if I'd seen the price of houses there recently.  I think Rory might be a city bubba.  He loved the excitement and the noise and having lots of nurses to fuss over him.  He is now quite the little charmer!  Instead of being a hermit, I'm determined to get out more with him.

I'll be continuing therapy to help rid myself of unhelpful thinking styles.  I realised that the reason I was shutting myself away from people was that I feared they were judging me for having an unsettled baby.  I now realise that 'mind reading' is terribly unhelpful.  There is no way I can presume to know what people are thinking.

Today Rory and I had our first day alone together while Duncan was at work.  I enjoyed the time I spent with him.  We went for a lovely long walk with the dogs.  We had cuddles.  I loved seeing him look at his reflection in a mirror and smile and giggle.  Although I'm so very glad the newborn stage is over and I'm enjoying having a three-month-old, I can now see how stressed I was becoming because I worried too much about housework and resented Rory for keeping me from it.  I still buzz around doing a few things while he sleeps (he still catnaps a lot unfortunately), but I've drastically lowered the high bar I'd set for myself.  I might not have much to show for my day, but at least I will have some good memories.

The first time I brought Rory home from a hospital, things didn't go so well.  I'm sure there will be still be days that won't.  But I no longer wish the days away in despair.  I have new hope and I'm thankful for a new chance to grow in my role as Rory's mum.